The only way we can ever truly heal emotional pain is by being courageous.
And this means going back to where our pain started. Sure, it is not pleasant, but it is a necessity in order to heal.
This means we need to go back into ourselves. Back into who we were.
Without doing this, we will achieve nothing.
And this is where most people fall down. They do not think they have the courage to go back into themselves. Fear takes over – and I understand; we all have it – but we need to overcome this fear.
Our job is to firmly understand, but more importantly believe, that we are not a terrible person.
This is where the suffering lies.
Thinking and believing we are bad is what is settled into the drivers seat of our pain.
It has the wheel and it is taking us on a journey.
But it’s not just as easy as feeling ‘bad’. Feeling bad accompanies other beliefs that produce pain.
I speak personally here, but I felt shame and a sense I had no power whatsoever growing up as a child, teenager and finally into adulthood.
I was scared of doing anything in the hope it was ‘wrong’.
I had no inner power to speak my truth. I was very anxious and shy towards many people when it came to making a decision and showing confidence.
Once the penny drops and we understand we have these beliefs, we need to really tell ourselves that we are not ‘bad’ or ‘wrong’ for even having them in the first place.
Because what good would that be? We’re trying to rid ourselves of shame – and beating ourselves up for feeling bad only adds more layers of shame.
So please do not do this.
‘I feel bad for feeling bad’ – get rid of this thought if you are having it.
‘I’m ashamed I feel this way about myself’ – ignore this and move on.
The mind is a powerful tool, so it is wise to be wary of it.
And even when it comes to healing it can try and make you feel bad – it’s ridiculous.
The amount of times my mind has tried telling me I’m not healing fast enough and I should be further down the road than I am etc etc…
Know this is mind talk, so ignore it. You are exactly where you need to be.
Healing takes time, patience and lots of consistency.
Another key thing to note is that you are not your emotional pain. That’s right – you’re not.
That’s not who you are, but we identify with it grandly.
Pain isn’t who you are. Yes, your body has emotional pain inside it as a result of trauma, but that doesn’t mean it is you, so try not to identify so much with it as being ‘yours’.
You are awareness, or spirit, or God. Whichever one suits you.
You are not your pain.
This isn’t to say our pain needs neglecting, because I wouldn’t be writing this guide if that was the case. This is me explaining that there is a balance to be had with pain.
You know it is in you, so that is enough. You know it needs healing, so that is enough.
But we do not need to cling to it as if it is our actual identity.
So try and start thinking this way as this will help you on your healing journey.
You do not need to recite mantras to yourself (although it may help) – but rather have a knowing inside that this pain you carry is not who you are.
You will reach a point when you know you are not ‘bad’ or not good enough. You can’t put it into words really, you just feel it inside.
When you reach that point, this means that awareness has kicked in and your concepts are starting to diminish.
But this can take time – a long time for some. It did for me. So be patient and keep working on yourself.
Now, here’s the interesting bit:
When you do reach the point where you believe and know you are not bad or not good enough – emotional pain starts to release.
The valve is open just a little bit. It lets you know it’s ready to start coming up and out.
Is it pleasant? It depends which way you look at it. Most people say no, but when you see it for what it is, you may start to call it beauty.
You understand that being ‘bad’ was just a belief, and it’s not true. It was an untrue thought.
So when awareness takes over and you firmly believe you are not your conditioned thoughts and beliefs – you change completely inside.
You go from vibrating at a low level of dark energy, to now a much more higher level of light energy. It’s love, basically. There is more inner love.
If you keep thinking the same belief and thoughts about yourself, you will always believe them.
So when you step outside and train yourself to not think the same thoughts, this is when change can take place.
When we do not identify with pain as much as we did (thinking it is who we are), it actually starts moving on its own accord.
You don’t have to do anything. All doing is being done by your body.
You’re not feeding it any longer, so things start moving inside.
It seems easy to write this and say ‘You are not your beliefs, thoughts and pain’, but it can take a while to hit this point of knowing you’re not.
But when you truly let go of these old beliefs, your consciousness changes and this is where the magic happens.
And when your consciousness changes, pain starts to move organically.
It is imperative we show this movement of pain lots of compassion and love, and not shame or disgust. Because, well, otherwise – it’ll get suppressed again and we all know where that took us…
Show your pain love and compassion and you are free. Healing begins.
Article #5 will follow.