You may come across the term ‘heart expanding’ quite often during your spiritual path. You’ll see it in books, articles and videos. Countless spiritual teachers use it.
The process of your heart expanding can be unpleasant at times. There’s no denying this.
In my experience, the heart expands in stages. It cannot be opened immediately all in one go from being closed. There’s a lot of undoing to be done. A lot of processing. A lot of change. And this hurts.
I guess we can refer to the heart expanding as another word for the heart chakra opening. It’s all the same thing. The process and outcome is the same, just the term differs.
One thing those on an awakening can agree with is that for years and years – decades for many – our hearts have been shut down and not open to give or receive love.
We hold a big shield around our heart to protect it from hurt and pain, and we have lived our lives in this mode missing out on the beautiful feeling that comes with giving and receiving love.
I thought I knew what love felt like before my heart cracked open, but I was lost in wishful thinking and now look back and understand it was ego-love, and a ‘love’ based on self-protection and demands. A love based on defending, protecting, conditions and neediness.
Most people do not love others like they claim to. They love the idea that they cast upon them as love, and declare this as true love, but their ‘love’ is actually desire, and beneath desire lays sorrow, neediness and lots of reassurance-seeking, which is quite evident in some people, or done subtly in others, despite them being unaware of such.
When we experience pain, our heart opens more, but first we must acknowledge this pain, then we are free to heal.
And when we have finished healing the scar that called us to be sewn together, our heart cracks open just that little more in order for a gorgeous ray of new, fresh light to make its way in.
So, it’s all about healing and allowing ourselves to feel grief, loss, rejection and abandonment. All the things we have accumulated over decades.
But,uncovering this pain is so worthwhile on the path to an open heart. It is a requirement of the spiritual journey, and one you can choose to ignore for as long as you like, but there will come a point where you are cornered and healing has to take place.
And this healing comes and goes in waves and cycles. It’s unavoidable. It’s part and parcel of it all. It’s liberating. It’s freedom.
You think you’re out the woods, and you will be for some time, but it soon comes around to dig deeper into the dark pain that has yet to be uncovered and brought to the light.
As you go through each stage, more light enters. This light equals more love and more compassion and more understanding.
You learn to let it flow. Your guard is down and you welcome the pain with open arms. Perhaps it sounds ludicrous to you reading these words, but I assure you that there comes a point after experiencing this many times, that you allow it because you know what is happening.
You know the routine and you let go and trust.
Learning to bring presence to what you’re feeling is where the progress takes place, period. Letting this life force – whatever it is – work its magic on you and pull the strings to releasing pain; this is where it all happens.
Be vulnerable, and feel it. Allow it. The reason we fear being vulnerable is because we have an ego, and it’s done a pretty good job of protecting us from feeling pain.
Trust what is happening to you. We don’t really know what’s happening to us, but we learn to trust it and watch this creative force do its thing.
We become open to it. We give up the need to defend, protect and trying to be safe all the time. It’s too exhausting, and we understand this.
We don’t necessarily need to know what’s happening to us on an intellectual level, but we can trust it. So when your body is feeling out of sorts, your emotions are like a roller coaster and you are crying and shaking involuntary – trust it.
This is the heart opening and expanding. This is love. This is all we have ever been and known, yet what has been left outside on the sidelines second to fear.
But this unidentifiable or non-visual light was willing to wait for us. It’s patient and it’s who we are, so it was never going to go anywhere.
Let it do its thing. The heart, mind and body takes time to re-adjust and work in synergy to the changes. You are literally transforming and removing part of who you thought you were.
You are re-training yourself like a child in school. You are re-educating your beliefs and programming, and this brings pain.
But during this process and many stages you enter – be kind to yourself and show yourself compassion and gentleness. A conditioned human isn’t very kind to itself.
If you don’t show yourself kindness, but place demands and expectations that you aren’t making progress on this journey, then you’re allowing yourself to revert back to programmed conditioning.
This journey isn’t meant to be easy. There are lessons to learn, and the main one is learning to live from your heart.
We will resist and fight during this path of our heart opening – and this is fine. It will happen, and a lot. But trust it and forgive yourself.
And if you don’t trust it, then that’s okay too. We are humans and there is no perfect human being.
It will get easier and you will learn to sit back and trust the process more and more, and transformation does its thing and you start to live from your heart – you notice this.
And when you trust the process, you are accepting yourself, which is all you’ve ever wanted. Imagine getting something you’ve always ever wanted? This is the feeling your heart gets when it is opening.
You will get triggered, you will feel you are going backwards and you will feel out of alignment, but this is normal. You won’t remain there, I assure you.
You see it, are ready for it and allow it to come forward. You’re present with it, and the difference is, you don’t get caught in it for as long as you used to.
There’s no searching required. Don’t look anywhere to ‘find’ what you think is missing. Your heart knows best, and the life force knows what to do and how to open you more to giving and receiving love.